I wasn’t intentionally manipulating circumstances so I was the only person capable of editing the file. I was simply using the proper tools to create my best work. Still, I had done just what my accuser’s teammate had explained. I had ‘stitched myself into the work’. I understood the phrase had negative connotations, but what if this metaphor has positive qualities that could enhance our contributions and our satisfaction in contributing?

What I’m saying is similar to what Seth Godin endorses when he writes . . .

You have brilliance in you, your contribution is essential, and the art you create is precious. Only you can do it, and you must.

Seth Godin, Linchpin

The world seemingly demands us to create what the can understand and hold in their hand, manipulating it to whatever they wish or envision. But, can’t they make that themselves?

Truly, what the world craves is the rarity that resides within you. They want to be stunned by something they could not do on their own. We want others to inspire us with a sense of wonder that leaves us asking, “How did she do that?”

Our heroes are the men who do things which we recognize with regret and sometimes with a secret shame that we cannot do. We find not much in ourselves to admire, we are always privately wanting to be like somebody else. If everybody was satisfied with himself there would be no heroes.

- Mark Twain

Do something others admire. You don’t have to write the next American classic or cure a disease. It could be something small, like the way you treat customers or how you encourage your co-workers.

What I do you cannot do; but what you do, I cannot do. The needs are great, and none of us, including me, ever do great things. But we can all do small things, with great love, and together we can do something wonderful.

- Mother Teresa

Stitch yourself into your work. Bring your unique personality, experience, passion, interests and gifts into the marketplace. It is what we really desire from you, and we will admire you for it.

The socialite walks into the ski shop and buys a $3000 ski jacket she’ll wear once. Why? Not because she’ll stay warmer in it more than a different jacket, but because that’s what someone like her does. It’s part of her story. In fact, it’s easier for her to buy the jacket than it is to change her story.

Once I recovered from the idea of paying $3000 for basically renting a jacket for a day, the idea of doing something “because that’s what someone like [you] does.” stuck with me. The phrase elucidates how we allow our lives to become parodies of ourselves. This is how we sleepwalk through vast segments of our life, only to awaken one day and not recognize the person we have become. A person living a life based on the expectations, desires and decisions of ‘someone like you.’

When you think of living according to what you know deep inside yourself, how does that make you feel? Does it excite you or simply raise your blood pressure with anxiety? Does it fill you with ideas or simply leave you feeling like you’re staring at an insultingly blank slate? Ask yourself why you feel this way. See if it connects with a deeper truth inside of you. It may be a truth you are unwilling to uncover from the shovels of dirt the world has piled on through the years.

If the idea scares you, perhaps it is because you have no clue what awaits under the lid of this box. I don’t blame you for being nervous, but be aware that you may be leaving yourself buried alive in that box as you let “someone like you” walk away, continuing to live your life for you.

1. Redesigning the Packaging
   I don’t know how many different versions I have created of this blog. The design keeps changing, but if I were to focus more on the content I am sure I would be more successful and content. Companies will of tens spend countless hours and money on getting their logo just right; all while ignoring customers and the demands of the market.How are you waisting time on packaging that you should be spending on creating?
2. Checking the Locks on the Doors (again)
   Being creative often means doing the lonely work. Meanwhile, our email chimes in, the TV news calls to us and the unlimited entertainment of the web sinks its addictive fangs into our arms.Are you able to shut out distractions when creativity needs your undivided attention?
3. Making the Copies
   We are creatures of comparison. If you never saw what other people were driving, you’d probably be fine driving and old Chevy pickup (not that there’s anything wrong with that). For an initial boost of inspiration, there is nothing wrong with looking at what others have done. Just don’t try and copy someone else’s success, and don’t continue to go back to that well. See what your inner creativity can add to your project instead of recycling other people’s ideas.Have you really poured your soul into your work? Are you doing anything original?
4. Star-Crossed Love
   If it weren’t for a bit of bad timing, Romeo and Juliet would have been a lot better off (putting it lightly). One of the curses of creativity is giving up too soon. Whether you want to play in a band or write a novel, you have to put in the necessary time to hone your craft. This is the 10,000 hours rule coined by Malcolm Gladwell in his book Outliers.
5. Yes Man Syndrome
   Your time is precious. Ever tell something mundane to someone, just to hear them snidely remark, “I’ll never get that five minutes back.”? Maybe they were being a jerk, but there is some truth to what they said. We’ll never get any five minutes back, in fact. So, be judicious in what you say ‘yes’ to. Networking meetings and lectures can be helpful, but if you’re spending more time talking about and listening to others talk about the trade than actually creating anything. . . then you’re stalling.

No. You’re not.

You’re obliged to create the things in this world that no one but you can create except the person with your experience, skills, passions, attitude and personality.

So, if you feel the pressure to be the consumer instead of the creator. Do me a favor.

Oblige me.

For the creator, an additional motivator should be the act of creating. This can feel selfish because we expect the artist wants to make her art. It’s true, she does WANT to create. Another truth is less apparent. She also wants people to be moved, inspired . . . perhaps transformed. A creator isn’t always trying to find fame, fortune and glory. Knowingly or not, he also wants to serve.

A point of clarification: we are all creators.

1. You can let it die.
2. You can fight like hell to revive it.
3. You can half-heartedly allow it to languish in limbo. Your past creations propping it up like an iron lung. This is cruel, both to you and your audience.

meme is defined as “an idea, behavior or style that spreads from person to person within a culture.” This could be anything from fauhawks, to LOL Cats to how you practice religion or whether or not you recycle.

We often unconsciously make decisions on how we relate to these memes. We can easily consume and be a conduit for these ideas, behaviors and styles without even realizing it. We can also be disinterested in or disconnected from memes with little thought.

What can truly define us are the memes we chose to create or chase and the ones with which we are determined to disagree. These are decisions we make with greater intention.

The issue with this is when we relate passively (positively or negatively) with memes of significance, while we relate intentionally to the less significant memes. I churn stomach acid over fictional TV characters and college football while real people are illiterate, hungry and/or dying of an easily-treated disease.

What would happen if we worked to relate intentionally with memes of significance?

Many of the ideas within the book would be hard to share in a short blog post, but one passage describing vision is a good indication of how the couple gives illuminating advice not only for business, but for life:

A vision becomes a framework for possibility when it meets certain criteria that distinguish it from the objectives of the downward spiral. Here are the criteria that enable a vision to stand in the universe of possibility:

• A vision articulates a possibility
• A vision fulfills a desire fundamental to humankind, a desire with which any human being can resonate. It is an idea to which no one could logically respond, “What about me?”
• A vision makes no reference to morality or ethics, it is not about a right way of doing things. It cannot imply that anyone is wrong.
• A vision is stated as a picture for all time, using no numbers, measures, or comparatives. It contains no specifics of time, place, audience, or product.
• A vision is free-standing – it points neither to a rosier future, nor to a past in need of improvement. It gives over its bounty now. If the vision is “peace on earth,” peace comes with its utterance. When “the possibility of ideas making a difference” is spoken, at that moment ideas do make a difference.
• A vision is a long line of possibility radiating outward. It invites infinite expression, development, and proliferation within its definitional framework.
• Speaking a vision transforms the speaker. For that moment the “real world” becomes a universe of possibility and the barriers to the realization of the vision disappear.

Later, Zander gives an example of HP Labs realizing a tiny shift transformed their competitive mission statement from aspiring to “be the best industrial lab in the world” to “be the best lab for the world” to  ”HP For the World.” It had now become a real vision.

During this time of economic uncertainty and workplace malaise, what better use of your focus, time and energy exists outside of putting forth and joining others behind a vision of true possibility?

It is an empowering thought to imagine all of our needs being met within our own power. It is also inaccurate.

We do not entirely depend on others for our success, failure or enjoyment; but our experiences are directly influenced by other individuals.

When I call customer support, the person on the other end of the line can exert power to inject the conversation with a desire to help or with disdain for my requests.

Each member of a team meeting holds a hand. They can decide which card to lay down at the table: collaboration, tyranny, eagerness, stonewalling or disinterest. What they play can change the whole game.

When addressing an incident, a manager chooses the story she tells her employee. The story could be about her commitment, and the commitment of the organization, to invest in the development of the employee. Or the manager could choose to tell a story of rules, infidelity and fear of what lies ahead. The selection of this story affects which story the employee chooses to tell himself, his colleagues and his family.

To a certain degree, we are at the mercy of others. We are not powerless victims, but we do need others to join us in telling a story that ultimately is about doing what is right, overcoming evil, sacrificing for others, showing compassion for the hurting, serving with joy and passion… a story about love.

To see yourself at the mercy of others may feel disempowering, but then there is the realization that others are at your mercy as well.

Interdependence is and ought to be as much the ideal of man as self-sufficiency. Man is a social being.
Mohandas Gandhi

In a small twist, I’d like to take this anecdote and actually put it to use.

Anecdotes are recommended to presenters (including pastors) to help break the ice, bring comic relief and engage the audience. The problem is when the anecdote doesn’t relate to the message. Even if you’re not a presenter, this is relevant to you.

What is the TRUTH about your company’s story, your family’s story, your story?

If you ask this of your colleagues, your employees and your customers, will you get mostly the same story or greatly varying answers?

Why would they vary? Because everyone has their own personal experience. We possess our own anecdotal evidence to support our perceptions about most everything. And this personal story IS our truth. Unfortunately, we may be telling a story that doesn’t connect with what people experience. Like the case of the pastor’s sermon, the anecdote and the message don’t relate.

The idea of telling a consistent story isn’t new. Not even close, but are you paying attention to the anecdotes you are creating? Every interaction with someone else is an opportunity to frame the story they tell. If others all start telling the same basic story, then you may reach a (tipping) point where people who haven’t interacted with you directly are helping tell your story. We could call this Critical Anecdotal Mass.

It isn’t about manipulation or distortion of the truth. It’s about being authentic, but intentional. They are stories about Apple’s hyper-controlled design standards, the brilliant generosity of Tom’s Shoes or the affordable build-it-yourself eurostyle of IKEA.

So, let’s put down the futon anecdote, step away slowly and start telling the stories that matter.